NiGHTS for Wii

Dear SEGA, stop raping your back catalogue. You got NiGHTS right the first time. All you had to do was write new levels, tidy up the graphics and port to your platform of choice. I'm a huge Nights (I've had enough of the weird capitals) fan, and I was really looking forward to playing it again after all these years. But srsly wtf?

Now, I've only got as far as the BOAT Nights level but :

Nights does not speak, in fact no-one should.
Walking levels? Are you fucking kidding me?
Rotary controls on a platform with 8way analogue sticks? Really?
Sonic Team needs new camera code, urgently.
An owl helper/sidekick, who addresses you as "visitor" in spite of there being only two characters.
Nights is all about maintaining flow, the frame rate needs to be constant.
A fucking BOAT LEVEL? Nights turns into a BOAT? The fuck?
If I fail a level, you need to give me a clue as to why - "You ran out of time."

About the only thing I can see you got right so far is the soundtrack.

How much of a nights fan am/was I? I'll let the pick guard on my bass guitar anwser that :


Seriously SEGA, buying your games is like being in an abusive relationship. I love you baby, but you hurt me all the time.